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i think you should talk to him abt this, like honestly. be honest to him about ur feelings lately, how you've been, and whatnot. other than that whoever you are im proud ur taking therapy and hope things get better for you 🥹🫶🏼 |
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Not enough info. From what you said, maybe you're overreacting and need to chill, or maybe he's a giant dickhead and you're going to therapy to gaslight yourself into being mistreated more easily. Impossible to say from here. Like what he does to annoy you and make you look bad in public. How you react. What he says when you talk about it, and then does it again. All the details. when he annoys me its because he watches instagram reels with a loud volume (those reels that are just people yelling) when im trying to have a chill time and i kindly ask him to turn it off and he never does. and at a mall he has ran away from me and left me alone just because he got excited to see something. he is also ALWAYS and i mean always late to our dates. and he complains about the cost of things when he agreed to go. these things happen almost every single date and thats why it gets me so annoyed that i lash out. theres more that i genuinely just cant remember now for some reason, i apologize. in public he has no social awareness, he will walk into people and be loud and be rude to employees. he doesnt know how to use his card. i mean really? he will walk ahead of me or behind me when im walking at a completely normal pace mind you. it makes us look like we arent even together and it embarrases me. he just isnt very good in public. you know how theres some people that really just have no social awareness? thats him. the way i react is by either starting to ignore him or quietly scold him. and it gets him really sad. later when i apologize, we talk about it and i ask him to stop doing all these things that gets me upset and he says that he isnt doing anything wrong and then continues to do it. i hope this is enough, lmk if you need more info I mean I guess his public behavior could just be that he lacks self awareness. But the important part is when you talk to him about it he just says he's not doing anything wrong and he keeps doing it. To me that says he doesn't care, he's not even acknowledging your feelings, just dismissing them. So no I don't think you need therapy to learn but to criticise him. He needs to listen to you and realize it doesn't matter if he's doing something wrong, it matters that it's hurting you. I remember somebody told me something like this once. Because I'm a giant asshole obviously, but I always thought I was just being funny and if somebody was offended by me they're just stupid. Anyway somebody told me. If people think you're being an asshole, you ARE being an asshole. You always have to be aware of the people around you and how they are taking your "jokes" or whatever. And I think that's true. But some people really need to learn it, doesn't necessarily make them bad people, but they neeeeeed to learn it. thank you! i appreciate your help. this helped me a lot and i will have a serious talk with him about how he dismisses my feelings and doesnt care that what he does hurts me. i really hope he can learn to have more awareness in public and to stop dismissing my feelings because i do really love him despite all this. also, you seem like a very mature person. i applaud u for that thank you again |
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idk im not a therapist but ig you should talk with him. I think id be healthier if u both talk about it and try to solve it. Cause u can not lash out at him and keep it all to yourself but thats not healthy in a long term. also the problem will be still there, which is his behaviour. so yea, idk, maybe talkin with him could help (●'◡'●) ouuh, ig thats more difficult then. maybe u should talk with ur therapist then cause tbh if i were in ur place id give him an ultimatum lol, but i dont wanna give u bad advice |
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yea we have been talking about it and i always end up just apologizing and it happens again. thank you!
by evaland09; ; Report