am i losing my friend or just overthinking?

we’ve been friends for eight years. we never fought, things were always good between us, and I thought we were fine. we never texted 24/7. she could message me in the afternoon and I’d reply the next morning. or the other way around. and that worked for us, it was normal, no one got upset

lately I feel like something has shifted. it’s hard to explain, but she seems different. more distant somehow. she rarely texts first, and when I reach out, her replies feel short and empty. I keep telling myself it’s just my anxiety, maybe she’s tired or busy, but the feeling doesn’t go away

over the past month she’s made a lot of new friends. and I get it, that’s completely normal. but inside it makes me feel jealous in a way I don’t know how to deal with. I’m ashamed of that jealousy because we’re just friends and I shouldn’t expect her attention. I notice she spends a lot of time with them now, and it stings, even though I know it’s her life. I’m not used to watching her from the outside, not used to feeling like I'm on the edge of her life. and I don’t want to be possessive or make her feel guilty

when I ask her to hang out or meet up, she says no. sometimes she has a reason, sometimes she’s vague, and I can’t tell if she’s genuinely busy or just doesn’t want to talk to me anymore. I start feeling like I’m pushing, like I’m being annoying. and it hurts, because I’m not used to feeling unwanted around someone who’s been my closest person for so long

sometimes I think it’s just jealousy. sometimes I think my feelings for her might be deeper than I realize. sometimes I’m just scared of being alone, because she’s the only close person I have. there’s no one else. she’s always been my main person, and now I’m scared I’m losing her

I don’t know if any of this is real or if I’m making it all up. maybe I’m just overthinking. but I needed to say this somewhere. I don’t know what I’m hoping for. maybe just for someone to understand this and tell me I’m not going crazy