bro whats my sexuality

ohh my god so like i dont know what my sexuality is, i THOUGHT i was pansexual in 2024 but i dont really think so cuz i have a hard time feeling attraction towards anyone in general. and when i do feel something towards someone, IT GOES AWAY WHEN THEY START LIKING ME BACK ????? but i wannttt a relationship so badd ,, help me pls

i think im cupioromantic, lithromantic or possibly aromantic. maybe a mix of all 3 or its just something else ..? i like the idea of being in a relationship but when im actually in one i just feel odd, plus again i have a hard time really feeling anything romantic towards anyone. the only time i think i actually really liked someone (while in a relationship with them) was when i dated my online friend in early-mid 2023 but i dont think they even liked me back and they kinda showed that so thats probably why my feelings stayed and i continued to chase them (relationship lasted 3 months)

ive had probably 3 encounters where i secretly start liking someone but the feeling goes away the second they start reciprocating my feelings. i never tell them too, they just start liking me back. when i have a crush on someone i DONT make it obvious unless i directly state it to them, the most recent encounter with this was last year with my ex bestfriend.

and also whats weird is i constantly fantasize of having a relationship, and often my gender preference would change. like for the past week its kinda been leaning more to me liking girls but then other times i'd want to date a guy more, its just so confusing to me

i lwk dont think im ever gonna get into a relationship again