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I don’t know if you’ve watched Dead Poets Society, but if you haven’t, there’s a scene where Robin Williams is telling his students about how we live for poetry and art. I don’t remember the exact quote but you should look it up. My POINT is, that a) no one can force you to do something you don’t want to do, it’s your life and only you have the authority to decide what path you go down, and b) if what you love to do is something you feel real, true passion for, my advice is to pursue it because so many people go their whole lives without ever feeling any passion for anything, so you’re very lucky in that sense :)