Cool

I hate my body not for the reasons you might think, I simply wish I was born with male body parts, it hurts looking in the mirror and seeing a body I don't want, I hate my voice, I hate not being sure of what I am, I hate how fast sweet can go sour, I hate how awkward it is when someone asks what I am because I don't know one minute I want to be male then the next I enjoy being female which disappears as fast as it had come I wish there was a switch that allowed me to completely change my gender whenever I want but there isn't I have to live in this body sometimes I think about going fully male as soon as I can but at the same time I know I want to give birth, I guess maybe I could fully transition after having kids but will I ever have enough? what if I suddenly realize I want more but now I would have to go through an entire process and have enough money for that I can't just transition then detransition whenever I want there's a process and money I know that I could adopt too but I want to have my own baby something me and my husband created. Anyway maybe I'm thinking about it too much I have a long while to go