The horror, bad kind of horror

I'm going to 8th grade genuinely scared cause I'm going to have to use the girls restroom, and then who knows the friends situation I already have to use the girl's restroom everyday but like even when I do I get nervous because I'm like what if they get mad at me? I do not look like a girl at all and I like that but I don't like that everyone will probably be confused, I'm dead ass tired of "Are you a boy or girl?" Cause I will be forced to appear as a girl, meanwhile every time I meet someone new I will automatically be like "Yep I'm a man, a very manly man ð." My parents do not know not too sure I want them to know, they've made some questionable remarks on certain stuff, but anyway I know life is gonna be hell when all I hear people calling me is "         " No I will not be saying that damn name ð , I feel awkward about school it's a love hate relationship if you know what I mean, it's not even gonna be a secret the teacher's are gonna know the name my mom gave me, they're gonna know my birth gender then they're gonna let all my classmates know I mean maybe I could tell everyone else what I want but sometimes I rather not, I rather just sink into my seat and let it be