My experience as a TTI survivor. Part three. Arrival.

When we arrived at the wilderness program the transporters roughly dragged me from the car to hand me over to the two staff who were to process me in. The transporter I had managed to punch on the nose told them “Be careful with this one. He’s got violent tendencies. The hateful little creature punched me on the nose “. (He actually said hateful creature not hateful child as though he didn’t even regard me as a human being).

The staff told me to undress for a strip search. Because there was something uncomfortable about the way they were looking at me I didn’t feel comfortable with getting undressed so I refused. Their response was to forcibly (with a degree of force that was violent) undress me and search me. They visibly enjoyed every second of it and I honestly believe that it was sexual for them.

After the forced strip search one of them made an unmistakable death threat. His words (as closely as I can recall them) were “You had better lose the attitude because not all kids return alive from wilderness. Accidents can happen and things can be made to look accidental. I believe it was your birthday afew weeks ago so think about whether you want to see your next birthday. This threat, straight on top of the forced strip search, left me shaken and terrified. I don’t think it was just an empty threat to scare me because kids sometimes die as a result of TTI programs. 

This experience alone gives an insight into these abusive programs. The transporter referring to me as a creature suggests that they view their victims as subhuman. The forced strip search,although not technically an SA, certainly had many of the characteristics of an SA. The death threat suggests that they have zero concern for human life and every day more kids are placed in the “care “of sadists who simply don’t care.