Hs teachers suck.

My math and chem teacher in hs were the absolute worst. I don't usually wish bad things on people, but man, they deserve it. I'd prefer 10 years of college over reliving one year of hs. 

Unfortunately, the effects teachers have on teenagers, aka a category of people who are gradually developing mentally and psychologically, are underrated. Everyone takes teaching 14-18 year olds too lightly. 

I'm much more confident now, I hold 5-7 presentations in front of the class every semester. But there's still so much stuff I postpone or give up on when I hear someone say something remotely discouraging, even when accidental and easy to brush off as a joke. I start projects sometimes, but my dad would say, for example, something innocent like "do you have time for that?" and I'd feel immediately down for no reason. 

I also hate seeing my tests. I don't usually come to lectures when profs say they're gonna talk with us individually about tests. The moment I see the red pen or they try to explain what I did wrong, I get weirdly defensive because there was a time when I was getting bullied instead of taught. I still haven't opened an email from last year of a prof sending me a graded test back. 🤡

I wanna be a teacher too, but sometimes I ask myself if I can handle the stress of children without turning into a bullying asshole like the teachers I've had, so I'm still pondering on that. I wish I could've pursued child psychology (I wasn't accepted in psychology) and help teens who are bullied and belittled by their teachers because it's such an overlooked issue in schools.