I miss you so fucking much

I kidnapped you in the dream. And tied you up and took you to my house. Then I forced you to tell me about yourself. I hope that you’re not afraid in the dream, I just wanted to talk to you. I didn’t want to kill you, just because I tied you up doesn’t mean I want to kill you. I want you to give me attention. I want to force you to be something for me. I’m not going to hurt you, I just want to spend time with you one on one. It’s not like you would talk to me either way. I said “hey I’m gonna leave, don’t move. Oh that’s right I forgot! You can’t.” I wish I had the guts to do this in real life. To try to get you to talk to me. 

I wish that I could start a cult and manipulate people into doing things for me. To feel as if I have power over them. It’s too bad that you couldn’t be around me. All you have to do is say something to me, and i would be happy for days. You don’t have to do anything romantic or sexual or anything because I’m not into that with you anymore (not saying we ever had) I want you to say anything to me. I was so normal when I was around you. 

I want to get people to die because of me. But not you. I want you to say something. Even just a hand signal. Something that will hold me over. And then I will be alone again. I don’t want to date you, I don’t want to fuck you, I would like to speak with you. I think I am going through a kind of thing, and it makes me seem terrible. But I’m not terrible in real life. So can we meet again some day.