i'm so happy about my boyfriend :)

i have found the sweetest, purest, most caring, most considerate, cutest, nerdiest, handsomest man on the face of planet earth. he's genuinely perfect so far, and i don't use that word lightly. i don't think i've ever been happier to be with anyone.

to be superficial yeah, he's really attractive, but that's beside the point. he's SO sweet and reassuring, every time i get nervous around him or apologize for anything he tells me i have nothing to worry about, or if i'm stumbling over my words he'll say that i'm doing perfectly fine and tells me to take my time etc. he's been doing this since before we even started dating too. omg yesterday i was messing with him because we were playing a two-player card game and i was saying stuff like "you're so mean to me" when he started winning but then he got in his head about it and almost started crying at the thought of ever making me upset :( stop. i felt so bad. 

he's SO generous, he keeps giving me things and offering to pay for things AND he's making me something in his pottery studio. he's SO creative and SO talented when it comes to pottery and art and stuff like that and i admire him so much for it but now he's making something for ME!!! ugh he's such a sweetheart that he literally offered to make me new hands for my clock because my mom somehow decided to just take the hands off of my clock?? (side bar, pissed as fuck because why would she do that...? just the hands?) anyways. 

he's an actual angel. my sweet innocent angel boyfriend. i don't know what i did to deserve him. i actually don't think i deserve him. he's too good for me. all i am is pretty, he's too good for me in every other way, and even then i think he's prettier than me. 

everything he does is so endearing too, he's a huge nerd and he can be awkward in the cutest way, but he also has this confidence about him that makes me lose my train of thought all the time. 

i've never been so determined to put so much effort into a guy so he knows how much i adore him and how grateful i am that he's mine. he's just too perfect and precious, i can't not do everything in my power to make him feel the most special. i don't even know how to do that tbh but i'm gonna try my darndest. 

i'm so worried about a lot of things, like how he's never done anything with a girl before and i've had two boyfriends before him and i feel like i'm grooming him even though he's only like a month younger than me lol. i feel like a tainted evil delinquent and he is this pure precious angel and i'm gonna hurt him in some way on accident because he's made of porcelain like his pottery and i'm so scared because i never want to cause this boy any negative emotions ever ever ever. ugh i'm gonna cry. okay i'm done that's all