L.O.M.L gone 4ever L.O M.L gone 4good

i keep thinking about my previous ex - specifically this one time when he told me he thought espresso by sabrina carpenter would be a song poppy from trolls would be singing. we had watched trolls: band together everyday for almost an entire month. i was going thru some stuff mentally and trolls is a comfort series for me. he didn't complain about seeing it back to back, day after day. he quite enjoyed it - laughing even if we heard the same joke multiple times, chuckling and holding me if something made me cry. he always thought it was so cute when i cried at cartoons.

he was the ex i had the most in common with, so similar yet so different. despite one reoccurring issue, we got along super well. i constantly wonder if he was who i was supposed to be with and we messed it up. i always hope he thinks of me, that he feels the same way i do - we could have done things different and still been together. 

i wonder if i will ever feel so intensely for anyone else the way i did him. 

it's been almost a year since he left in the middle of the night without my knowledge. i wish he would have just woken me up to tell me but he knew i would've begged. i still don't understand why he chose to end things that way but maybe i do. truly, maybe it was for the best.