making a neocities and it's a struggle

hi :P

it's more what i want to capture and the whole theme of my webpage. i want to make it look like kikuo's MVs and si_ku's artstyle. i want a morbid theme relating to death and carpe diem, memento mori and gothic love for the macabre and optimistic nihilism. i'm making it this fun journey that you've died and now the website is the afterlife :P

i have no issues with coding whatsoever its just trying to find the graphics and materials that im envisioning. nothing matches to what i have in mind :(

i'll link it here when i'm done :D