me and my piano

It feels kind of like the one thing that stays the same

this isn’t some kind of poem

whenever im upset i can play it

whenever im happy i can play it

when im bored i can play one of the few songs i know to a tea

when I have energy i can try learning a new one which I’ll never finish

it’s not something I love

most the time im playing i end up frustrated

i smash the keys and lay my head on the piano before picking myself back up and trying again 5 seconds later

i can try over and over and over and over again

I’ve been practicing the same 4 second segment for the past week

and I never get it

yet I can’t stop trying

im addicted to trying again and again and again 

I love challenging myself

and I love the thrill

most of all I love knowing

even if I fail

I’ll still live

and I can still try again

whether it’s seconds later, minutes, hours, or months

it will be there

and ill get it at some point

I guess I do love piano