My first gay relationship

Back when I was in 6th grade, I was still figuring myself out. I thought I was a girl and that I was bi. I'm now genderqueer and cupioromantic, but that will make more sense as you read. Anyway, I was starting to make some friends in band class, and basically one of my friends had another friend who had another friend; let's name them O. Now, O and I formally met when I had bought some stickers for my friends and had one left. O was sitting there next to one of my friends, getting their instrument ready. I was like, "I could give this stranger, who I knew was friends with my friend, a sticker to make their day!" I remember handing them a cat sticker with two cats: one orange and the other black. They said, "Aww, this reminds me of me and my GIRLFRIEND." ... 💀 This was my first time hearing them speak, and it was about their girlfriend, plus I hadn't really seen anyone be THAT open about their sexuality other than my friend group. We started talking for like a day or so, and suddenly their girlfriend had broken up with them, or they broke up with her... I don't remember. Nevertheless, we kept talking, and like a week had passed when they had gotten out of that relationship, and they asked ME if I wanted to date them... 😳 Being the 12-year-old I was, I was like "OMG someone just asked me out." So of course little me said yes. The relationship was pretty healthy, and we even hung out together at the mall and at my house, even though I had strict parents. They genuinely made me happy. UNTIL I got a text from them during summer break: "I'm breaking up with you, I just didn't feel a CONNECTION"... 😭 12-year-old me was DISTRAUGHT. WDYFM you didn't feel a connection? 

I looked back on our relationship; maybe I was the problem. Maybe I wasn't as affectionate as they wanted me to be; maybe I hugged them too much rather than kissing them; maybe I was plainly not good enough for someone. 

When I started 7th grade, I did NOT want to see them ever again. I dropped out of band and joined an after-school art club. Luckily, I didn't have any classes with them, and art club was FINALLY starting. I sat down at a table next to my friend group, which had way more people now. I was at peace. Well, until I looked to my left and my heart dropped to my stomach. In the very last seat at the table was O. Plain as day, chatting to other people at the table. I tried to avoid them the best I could, but I ended up talking to them. I wondered if maybe they were better off without me. And let me tell you. THEY. WERE. DATING. MY. OTHER. BEST. FRIEND. It's like they just moved on so quickly from me. And yeah, we haven't talked much after, and I'd like it to stay that way.