Public transport complaints

Complaint 1: Hardcore memers

I saw those guys on the train I decided to write this blog on because jeez, they've done a lot. At first it was just laughing at tiktok memes too often (YOOO I JUST SAW A KOOL SK8R OUTSIDEDEE uh, anyway), then they played the sounds too loud. They also talked very loudly about having STDs. But the worst part came up when they started laughing their asses off. I say that because the pants of one the boys fell off. By the way, these are supposed to be 18-19 years old, which is far too old to do ts.

Complaint 2: Odors

Oh, boy. The amount of unpleasant smells here. It's not always, but it happens 2/6 times. When you corrol8 public transport with what unfavorable nasal sensations, you probably think of somebody stinking due to poor hygiene. And yes, that's the case most of the time, but you've only licked the tip of what the iceberg of these occasions has to involuntarily offer you. 

2day on the same train I smelled sunscreen...A lot of sunscreen. Fortunately, those were designed to have a pleasant fragrance that takes you back to the memories of your vacations...That is, if you've ever been to one, and surrvived the smells that come with transporting yourself there.

What however isn't designed this way is weed smoke. And that's just something u have no choice but reconcile with, due to the wide accessibility of this substance, regardless of its illegality here. I'm pretty sure u can get secondhand smoke from weed but if it does happen to have an effect on you, you'll just fit in with the rest of those who reside in this city, for they, too, are most of the time under influence.

The worst of these all is when somebody grabs a perfume and keeps spraying it and spraying and spraying...Till you start to ponder in fear how long has it even been since they have begun doing that. And if you have been holding your breath till then...maaaaaate what a bad method to die have you chosen. It maybe is more desirable to die jumping headfirst out the train, than submitting yourself to cough so much u start beatboxxing the moment you inhale.

Complaint 3: Myself

Yup, you read that right. For some reason the thing that bothers me more than all those things is a flaw of myself.

U see, the past few days I've been seeing this super cool guy on the train station. He always wears baggy jeans but combines it sooo damn well! "Man, I wanna be like him" I tell myself all those times I see him. I wanna be his friend and THIS is when the bad part comes in — I just stand or sit there. Occasionally glance on him and that's it. Imagine the friendship we could have but I don't do anything, I don't interact with him. I could probably just come up to him and compliment him and try 2 get the conversation going. But 1) he's a stranger and I don't know any of his interests besides Metallica (thanx 2 a T-shirt he once wore) and he's kinda giving me the vibe that he might be a skater. And 2) I'm trans and my classmates don't know that because my fucking stupid psychiatrist convinced my mom not 2 let me socially transition. I have a feeling that if I got 2 know this guy, he'd be nice, accept me and I could match his energy. (Which I have no idea how 2 do because I only had 1 cis guy friend and he was an asshole.) But this could be my first connection in this new city that feels genuine. That is, if we got along. 

Here's another thing that scares me: I haven't seen him last Friday and today, so I suspect we might not have some hours during which we get on the station aligned so I might not see him every day OR ever again, which makes me sad because I've spent more time thinking about this guy than any of the people I'm actually friends with. So I hate my guts for not knowing better and talking to him. For now all I can do is try to see if I fw metallica and make a custom skateboard. Yeah, I'd waste this much time on a stranger.

Oh and some girl on the station came up 2 me asking if I'm going 2 the same station as her. I said yes and she asked me if she can go with me. On the train I asked her why she chose me out of all people...Turns out we were classm8s this whole time, I just didn't remember because she looked basic. And then 4 the rest of the ride she was just silent and stared in her phone... Why ask 2 go w/ som1 in the first place if u aren't even going 2 talk 2 dem???