random things

i feel so dirty,all the time.

i know theres things in and on my skin,i want to take them out but it leaves little scars and that leads to possible infection and bleeding,i can feel the dirt under my nails,im always picking at them,im always touching my piercings cuz i want to remove dirt from them,i can't stand it,it feels so gross knowing its there,i don't like bandaids because im scared there'll be something under it and it'll seal it into a cut or scrape,or scrapes on pavement and all the little rocks that can be on the scrape,im gonna throw up.