the reason her "hints" are vague is because she's manipulating you lol

this sounds crazy I know but HEAR ME OUT

The best way I can describe vague hints would be in two words: plausible deniability

Once I started treating relationships like this, I swear to God everything opened up for me. I'm chopped yet still have some SMOKING exes due to this mindset. not bragging... they ended horribly, but you get the idea. 

The reason a woman who is "interested" in you will communicate that through vague hints is to allow themselves an out if things don't go their way in the moment AND in the future. A "hint" is something that changes its meaning depending on how it benefits the person saying it. 

You ever have a friend send you pictures of some DMs she's having with a "weirdo" or "creep", but she refuses to block them? It's because she's utilizing these hints to paint two different pictures. The one in the DMs is one of flirty texts back and forth, and the one in YOUR conversation is one where she just says statements and he responds all weird. The same phrase has two meanings depending on the picture she wants to paint. She's farming attention from both of you, just different kinds.

I'll use an example from my own texts with my first ex. no names or anything, and it's not insulting because she was the only one that left things amicable lol (also I'm not self-glazing here because I'm lowk chopped now and this was over 2 years ago)

her:> I really want to visit (my state) :))) 

me:> really? what area are you wanting to visit?

her:> well like I mean in general like the mountains and stuff look pretty in the fall

me:> don't you live in (her state. same climate in her area too lol)?

her:> yea but i'm used to that dude

this was before we were together and she later confirmed that this was a hint

Her message communicates that she wants to visit me. However, at the time we were just friends, and it was kind of one-sided (I did not like her yet), so she gave herself an out. When I did not respond with "omg yes its awesome here you should come!", she took the out. The issue arises when you call them out on this, as they will deem it interrogation in their head while you are just taking it at face value. This can be why some women will act almost offended when you ask for details about something THEY brought up. She wants to pivot the conversation into something romantic without putting her own skin in the game. 

I think women know that directly approaching men and being straightforward makes getting with them easier, but when you're upfront with your feelings, you have a lot to lose. If it's unrequited, then you just got rejected by a MAN, and as much as we want to pretend gender roles are behind us, the idea of a woman chasing a man and failing is still horrific to a lot of them. The mere concept of a woman chasing at all is still somehow controversial, no matter how misogynistic it is.

In that example, I did not respond to her suggestion of visiting me but instead asked where she was planning on going in order to help her set it up. I communicated that I did not even consider her big enough in my life to have any kind of emotional reaction to her visiting. She was dry for like 3 weeks after this. 

Not only did she feel like she lost control of the conversation, but my response clarified that she is nothing special in my eyes. I was punished for not being the same kind of weirdo she sent me pictures of every day.

The reason I consider it manipulation is because they're never defined. If you replied in a flirty way to an obvious hint and it goes well in the moment, she can simply say it was never a hint in the future during an argument in order to paint you as a weirdo. In that case, it ends up looking like YOU are the thirsty one. Now you have to defend yourself when the evidence shows you being flirty out of "nowhere"!

I've had many talking stages do this. It's much harder to pull off in a direct relationship because there is already an understanding of affection from both parties. 

Sadly, it's almost impossible to respond in a way that protects you in the future, but it is possible to call them out in the moment to expose the true intention, even if it loses her attention.

NEVER assume a hint is flirtation before confirming other possibilities. The conversation location does not matter. I've learned that, even if she is actually interested in the moment and you end up pushing her away by taking it literally, it's never worth the damage that can be done if she removes the actual context later. If she truly likes you as a person, a single misread hint will not deter that, as is obvious in my examples.

It's diet gaslighting, and it's way too normalized.