using concepts to survive

i forget i can just chat about stuff im up to and like 2 people will see it

hi

ive been working on a game idea, and maybe turning it into a visual novel, unnamed.

the story will be based off of things ive been thinking about a lot. the major thing being feeling unhuman compared to everyone else and being left behind and unable to catch up. mostly specific things i feel like no one else feels the way i do.

basically im making an album thats a soundtrack to this game concept. whether or not the game will ever exist im not sure. but its helped a bit knowing i can work more on it later

i recently got my cheap painting tools out and painted a woman/concept named pARALY for right now. based off of sadako, kuchisake-onna, two favs, as well as krasue and some others. first irl painting since art class in high school, so im proud of it. probably subpar in terms of what other people are painting but im at least the one realizing this stuff. a lot of the comfort comes from- im working on something that symbolizes how i feel and the specific feelings ive felt.

it makes feeling like youre alone in your problems easier since your problems are represented by something you made. i forgot what it was like to have your own OC and world of your own. its badass

shes not the main character ,more the the actualization of something, i think i know what her parts gonna be.

the plot of the story has been written down, might have slight changes over time but i think i got something down i like, lmk if you give a hoot or ,wanna know stuff,