Venting : Confusion , am i a full-on trans man or am I genderfluid ?

Lately, I have been confused as hell. ive been confused ever since last year honestly. I started to feel different about myself at 11 years old then at 12 years old i started to think about being a boy then at 13 years old I started to think I wanted to be a boy and then at 14 years old I came to the fact that I wanted to be a boy so I got into my stud shit and now at 15 years old I'm into my stud shit. I have came out to my mom, dad, grandma, and grandpa. that's it.

I'm not out publicly cause I don't want people in my business and cause I haven't even started transitioning yet so what's really the point in telling people to call you this and that, you know?

But, although i love the thought of being a man.. i get urges. Like, i wanna paint my nails and do other girly shit. But, like i said in my first blog, i hold myself to a whole other standard where being feminine is a big no. But its like some days i feel like a boy then some days i feel girly and then some days i feel like i got no gender at all. 

its all confusing really.