was it casual?

for the past year, i have been stuck in this "casual" situation. so there is this guy, who first messaged me like a year ago on insta, more precisely on october 6th 2025. (for context we went to the same primary school and he was one grade below me). 

right after our very first conversation, there was this spark, we got along really well and he told me i had an amazing style and that he loved talking to me and i was so happy omg you guys cant believe it 🤭. after that we talked every day, late night chats, good morning/good night texts, heart emojis, i miss you texts, inside jokes, those pointless arguments like "you are smarter" and "no you are the smarter one" and those little dragged-out words yk. and when we stayed up late at night to talk he said he doesnt mind that he will be tired tomorrow because it was worth it cause he talked to me. and whenever we didnt talk during the day he said he misses me.

our first hang out was when he came out to meet me at the playground when i told him i was alone there and we talked for TWO hours straight about everything, literally EVERYTHING from school to music, to series to gossip to cars. when we said goodbye it was kinda awkward because we both wanted to hug each other (idk maybe he didnt want to, i suck at noticing signs 😭) but he told me to text him when i got home. after that he started saying that we should hang out again sometime but somehow we couldnt make that happen and i was so sad cause i really liked him. 😞 (i still do but thats a secret shh.) once he even said that we could go ice skating together (i LOVEE ice skating).

he also plays guitar (i find that so attractive btw) and he even offered to teach me how to play. he also knows that i LOVE billie eilish  and sent me reels and tiktok videos of her and he also sent me funny videos. when i dyed my hair pink, he wanted to see it instantly and told me "It looks so insanely good 😍". he also liked and replied to every insta story i posted of myself saying that i was beautiful, not just once but multiple times. whenever i was going on a trip, going out with my friends, got sick or i hurt myself his reaction was "oh im so sorry, i care about you, please stay safe. I don't want anything bad to happen to you 🥹🫶🏻." and when i had an italian exchange student staying at my house his first question was "im just curious, is the exchange student a boy or a girl?" plese tell me that im not overthinking this 😭

after new year's, we didnt talk at all. ofc i sent him a happy birthday text but he didnt send me one and i was devastated 😞. nine whole months of silence and i tried to move on and accept that maybe it was just a failed situationship.

on october 15th i posted a note on my insta and BOOM he appeared in my dm's and we started talking again and it was like no time has passed, like wtf 😭 idk what to do or feel and im so confused right now.