As a muslim, my relationship with the hijab has been quite straightforward. I had my doubts and annoyances here and there, but now it's like my main instrument for the outdoors, and I've learnt how to make it fit my identity. But growing up, I realised that isn't the case for anybody: from strict/abusive parents, societal pressure, cyberbullying and low self-esteem, it's no surprise that women within Islam might wanna take it off, or even leave the religion itself. And the way the muslim community reacts to this group does more damage than people would like to admit.
The hijab is a requirement in Islam where women essentially have to cover their hair, the main motives being for Allah and getting closer to them, or to avoid the opposite gender, basically making their religion identifiable to the outside world. The concept is still a heavily debated topic within the community, but what's seldom talked about is the impact it could have on so many women, mentally and physically
I'd say it starts at home; living within a strict traditional family does impact people in many ways, and I see it among Muslims as well, where they often force the hijab or conservative traditions on their daughters, in fear of being embarrased or being percived negitivly by their own communities, putting reputaion over their own childeren, which I think is already a recipe for disaster for many reasons, such as making them feel isolated and drained by the expectations their family constantly puts on them. When you live in the West, the impact is much more pronounced, where wearing the hijab can make you feel like an outcast or separate from others, whether it's at school or on outings. From almost the beginning of time, women have been constantly put into almost impossible beauty standards and have had their insecurities and bodies capitalised on for profit and oppression, which plays into being singled out. When you are told to do something that doesn't fit or isn't in the fold of a certain category, it makes you feel a lot of FOMO and hyper-aware of yourself and your surroundings, which is what I always used to feel in the early stages of wearing the hijab.
Beyond that, the way the Muslim community, or people in general, treat hijabis has always been quite toxic, and, dare I say, the main catalyst for women taking it off. People always expect hijabis to be the epitome of Islam, a walking example of a "chast" or "better" person. In reality, it only puts women on a pedestal, putting them under a microscope and demanding perfection and adherence to the book, but that simply isn't the truth. What people struggle to realise is that hijabis are humans first, not the other way around. We do sin, we make mistakes and struggle just like anyone else, but if we do, we are still constantly shamed and bullied for it. We are constantly being watched and surveilled by people who have never gone a day in their life having to experience the things hijabis do. The worst part of it is when we wear hijab, it puts a target on our back for racists and muslims alike (mostly men). On one side, we are attacked and discriminated against not only for our religion but heritage and ethnicity, and on the other side we have muslim men policing us, sexualising us and being bad faith by acting as though we are the worst people within the community when reality says otherwise.
You see this type of behaviour on the internet as well, constantly being the topic of slander when you're not the perfect muslim, pushing hijabis into a negative light which puts much more pressure on their shoulders. This type of constant harassment, digitally and in real life, begs the question of whether we should see the hijab as a "sheild" from men, because we've seen countless times that not only does it not protect them, but it's almost like a magnet for men to approach and abuse women who are just trying their best to follow their religion. All it is doing is putting a target on their back and making them even more prone to discrimination, which could lead to dangerous and irreversible consequences.
This is something no one should have to constantly deal with; it's no wonder so many women fell out of love with the hijab, not even their own people within the religion can humanise them, even when the religion itself isn't aligned with their strict judgement. Anti-social behaviour towards these women creates a space of negative judgment and disharmony that does a disservice to the religion that they claim to follow. No one should be forced to wear the hijab, nor should people pester hijabis whenever they're not the perfect representation of muslims. Some people just need more grace and acceptance for them to feel comfortable in spaces, and that's something the muslim community desperately needs to work on.