I have quite a few regrets surrounding highschool as a whole!! for one, I'd probably be in a better position if I didn't get held back so much and eventually dropped out on my senior year. but I really can't criticize myself for this, actually I feel more protective of my younger self than anything. That was the lowest period of my life. I was extremely mentally ill and had no will or real way of getting help, I was purposefully making myself worse and no one noticed. my body is forever mutilated from it and my life had some extremely close calls. it wasn't just school that I couldn't do, I couldn't do anything and that didn't stop until I was almost 20. I don't dwell on all of this too too much, because I'm honestly in a much better place and for that I'm grateful
but besides that, I began sophomore year with getting stuck in a relationship with this really manipulative guy for the next 4 years, which worsened my mental state even more. I regret it not just for the him-being-a-shit-person thing, but if I had the opportunity to experiment with my sexuality more I probably would've realized I only liked girls way sooner. my school had a lot of other queer folks so I could've made so many friends, or more, if I wasn't so isolated by him™
throughout my life I dated several men but no women at all, realizing that I'm lesbian is still fairly recent, which gives me crazy impostor syndrome sometimes. I really don't know how to meet new people IRL now that I'm an adult (dating apps scare me (I would lowk appreciate advice on this (thx))), and I struggle with even making friends, but honestly I want a girlfriend so bad 😭
but at least since 47 minutes ago I'm officially 21 so I can drink the regret away now!!!! (JOKE I hate alcohol I don't even want to try it lol)
