the other day while i was at work i caught myself absentmindedly thinking something really offensive about a few of the customers with food cards and was like... wtf where did THAT come from?
i suspect it's because my parents were really on my case about "you don't want to end up needing food stamps" when i was growing up and i guess that ended up mingling with some of the offensive stereotypes people in my school threw around around the same time. as a result even though i actually probably could use a food card i'm automatically like "but i'm not trailer trash and i don't live in the chicago ghetto?"
now that it's come to my attention, i've realized it's something i default to thinking and i shouldn't. i loathe prejudice so bad and i wish i would have realized this piece of it was stuck in my brain sooner. how do i get it out really fast?
related: i also had an aunt jenny that my parents constantly talked trash about because "she needs a food card and then begs grandma for cigarette money and beer." at her funeral we all learned she needed the extra money because despite being under the poverty line, she was providing shelter/meals for homeless people in her own home alongside over ten hours of charity work every week. (i have a feeling gma knew this, but mom and dad didn't)
despite the funeral, my parents STILL default to "begged grandma for cigarette money" any time jenny gets brought up. it's hard to get the image of my wiry-haired toothless aunt out of my head since i was always being compared to her.
You must be logged in to reply.