I was in love with a boy who turned out to not be a good boy and I'm in love with a new boy and he is so cute and sweet and is bringing me cigarettes but I cant stop thinking of not good boy and how much he didn't like me even though i loved him. new boy isn't gay and not good boy wasn't either. can someone kill me please I'm so exhausted why is everyone in love and kissing like why cant somebody kiss me. all I need is a kiss and i'll be good and sweet and I'll keep going i just need to share a cigarette with new boy and kiss him a lot. I keep looking at him in class and my friends tease me about it but I really cant help it. he's freckled and smiley and he treats animals so well and that's what really endears me. not good boy was a hockey player and I'm also a hockey player but he is worlds better than me and I really miss us comparing hand sizes and talking hockey and him teasing me and ughhhhh I'm cooked. I miss my ex boyfriend who lives 6 minutes away from me and smokes his brain away every single day. we were tragic together. I want to be tragic with him again. I want to get sucked into his world again and I want him to hit me until I cry again and I want to hurt him back so he can see how bad he hurt me and then we stay together because I loved him and I have never stopped loving him.
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