6? IS IT SIX???

i ended up blocking my best friend of like 16 years. lol. z was right about him. he's not worth my fucking time man. all this time i thought he knew. i thought he understood what it was like to feel like one thing has defined your life. somehow he just blew past that kind of understanding for me the second someone who really, really knew how *I* felt came into my life. fucking whatever.

b won't leave me alone. keeps pestering me about z. i don't care. i don't care what anyone has to say about him anymore. he's my friend.

people at practice keep looking at me weird. telling me i look tired. am i supposed to care? maybe i do. it doesn't matter. i'm a grown man. i do what i want with myself and it shouldn't be anyone else's fucking concern.

i finally feel like someone at least kind of gets me. really gets me. i miss him. am i wrong. am i a terrible person? maybe i am. i don't care anymore