a lot of you don’t see mental disorders as serious and that’s why you get surprised when people hurt others

I’m IRRITATED writing this so LISTEN UP. A lot of you motherfuckers went through the ‘I have 1 billion disorders’ phase, knew someone who went through it, or generally saw it back in lockdown. All of you have had very, very serious disorders normalised due to social media. A need to be special has made disorders and syndromes to be commodified and normalised, turned into simple labels to identify with rather than real diagnoses that are rare and usually rooted in severe trauma. 

ADHD, autism and OCD are not quirky little labels to put on yourself to be more unique. Don’t make jokes about being autistic or saying that autism is ‘so silly’ and then get disgusted when I have a meltdown. Don’t say you’re ‘so OCD’ and then get grossed out when I twitch and get genuinely stressed when something triggers my contamination OCD. Don’t get mad at people who have p-OCD and sexual intrusive thoughts. Don’t get mad at people with ADHD when their executive dysfunction actually affects them, after you just said you’re ‘so adhd’ for being a little scatterbrained. 

Same thing with personality disorders. These are serious conditions, even more serious than the things I’ve listed before, though all 3 of those things can be as bad as a personality disorder if severe enough. 

A personality disorder is fucking. Severe. They can harm people. My NPD is something I developed from years, a lifetime of severe trauma. My brain protects me by convincing me that everyone is wrong, and that I am correct. It protects me by making me think that I’m the best, it builds a shell for me to hide behind because I was abused so much that I needed to defend myself. 

A personality disorder does not care if it is ‘immoral’. All it cares about is if the person is safe. My personality disorder does not care that you are correct, it cares that I got hurt and it will protect me. Someone’s BPD does not care how little your mistake was, it cares that it happened, and therefore it’ll split. A person with ASPD does not care if you’re ‘nice’, they’ll still lie to you because they may have never been taught to actually care for others. None of you understand that this shit isn’t moral because morality is a societal structure that nature doesn’t care for! You can’t get mad at someone with a literal fucking personality disorder for hurting someone as if it’s the same as a neurotypical hurting someone! If you grow in a world where you are only shown violence and control, then you are going to put that out. It doesn’t matter if ‘others went through the same thing/have the same disorder and didn’t do that’ it matters that they were NEVER TAUGHT ANYTHING ELSE, HENCE WHY THEY DEVELOPED THE DISORDER. 

Now. Having a disorder is not an excuse to abuse people. Fucking obviously. But you cannot expect someone with a literal severe (usually) trauma-based disorder to NOT act out. To NOT be toxic. People can work to be better but our disorders can make us ‘bad’ sometimes because they are real mental illnesses and not just a little label we put on ourselves for fun. I’m trying to get better but I can still be unintentionally be very intimidating and bossy because..  I have narcissistic personality disorder. 

You can’t expect a person with ASPD not to manipulate others. You can’t expect a person with NPD to not have grandiose thoughts and never put others down. You can’t expect a person with BPD not to split. You can’t expect a person with HPD to not seek attention. You cannot expect someone to have a disorder without meeting the fucking diagnostic criteria for the disorder! Sometimes the diagnostic criteria isn’t moral because the place we grew in wasn’t DAMN NORMAL! WE ARE A RESPONSE TO SEVERE ABUSE, NOT YOUR STEREOTYPE OF A VICTIM!

I hope I got my thoughts out here without sounding like I was enabling too much. Society is way too fixated on morals nowadays that it’s forgotten that most humans.. really aren’t. Because morality isn’t real, bad people are hardly real, and what makes you ‘good’ is not your actions but your willingness to do better. You are not bad because you split or because you are narcissistic but society has to realise that we do, in fact, do these things and that we aren’t the perfect little plush toys they think we are.