about "safe spaces" and the paradox of tolerance

imagine you're a fish in a coral reef. youve been there your whole life- youre perfectly catered for that ecosystem, and that ecosystem is catered to you. now, imagine that all of a sudden, someone drops a few live lionfish in the reef. lionfish are not native to your reefs, and because of that, they have no natural predators there. obviously, this poses a problem to the ecosystem, as theyll eat everything in sight, killing off local species and depleting whatever they wont eat of food. 

the crazy part? this is something that happens to some groups of people, and they're always told to live with it, because it's a "safe space for everyone." 

THIS is the problem with the "paradox of tolerance." eventually, tolerance can loop back into intolerance. tolerating the lionfish leads to a lot of damage being done to the reef, because theyll eat  almost anything in site, and whatever they dont eat will starve from a lack of nutrients. a safe space for every fish was only really a safe space to the lionfish. 

im sure many of you reading this have never really been a fish in a coral reef, but my point is still clear: the problem with "safe spaces" that are made for everyone is that everyone includes people who will automatically make that space unsafe. if you allow racists in a space, it isnt safe for poc. if you allow ableists in a space, it isnt sae for disabled people. so on and so forth.

maybe this is just personal experience, but ive also noticed that spaces like these seem to spend more time telling marginalized people to tolerate their oppression and oppressors than they do telling those with bigoted mindsets to tolerate others. the whole idea of a "safe space foe EVERYONE" has essentially become another "progressive" way of phrasing oppression- "you cant just yell at them for saying/doing that, this is a safe space for everyone!" 

TL/DR: the problem with a lot of modern "safe spaces" is that they become so welcoming that they arent safe at all- if you allow wolves and sheep in the same place, youll only ever see wolves.