am i important?

i dont really know how to put this thought of mine into words. i think since i was a kid i've always had this question in mind, there wasn't ever a moment in my life where i felt like i meant something, like i mattered, or anything really. friends and family always say the same things whenever i bring this question up, but they never mean it, they only say it so i can stop bothering them with my issues. is this too personal for a blog? i dont know. i feel lost and numb, i don't know who i am anymore. i don't know if this life is worth it.

but fuck it we ball i guess.