Avoidance

TW: SH 

So turns out when you browse layouts and select one that it can delete your entire progress on a very long blog that u wrote, so ill rewrite/write smth new <3

When i joined a call recently that had 2 of my "friends" in it, one of them immediatly left and the other started talking and made up some bs excuse why he cant stay any second longer and has to go, who walks their dog at 8:27pm ._.

They are always tryna avoid me at all cost, they are just my friends so they can feel better abt themselves and say "i helped the deppresed person when no one else cared" like girly pop u didnt do anything for me ever, all i got was a petty gift which is just a piece of paper with ONE whole sentence on it.

I also just wanna say that i am starting to concern myself bcs like i dont wanna cut myself but i always end up doing it no matter what, the cuts also seem to be getting deeper and deeper, leaking more and more blood everywhere, idk why i am like this i just wanted to be happy.

"we are always here for you" no your not, that only applied to the few days after my breakdown when i tried to end it but would you look at that, im here all by myself sitting in a call all alone while they are playing togheter, having fun and im writing a blog abt my feelings.

not even my bf wants to join the call im in, im truly all alone, i just wanna die