Blog #3 || Implementing your imagination into a story without forgettin details

Just to put it straight... I've been writing a Johnny Kelly x Kenny Hickey fan fic.

 YEAH OKAY SO WRITING RPF CAN BE AN EMBARRASING FIRST EXPERIENCE THATS OKAY! (Though, it is my first time and it's taken me at least a week of debating whether it's worth writing or not... I hope you can see where the verdict lead.)

But y'know, I wanted to make it cute and accurate as possible so I rewrote a singular paragraph 3 times and let my friends decide which one sounded better. Then after I finished rewriting those, I was stumped because I didn't know how to progress the story even more.

Plus I've only ever seen 4 fan fics about them anyway, might as well add to it... Right? But anyway, that's just background context for understandin'

I wrote to my bestfriend about this on such an ungodly hour (COUGH 3 A.M )  and let me tell you I sent her not 1, but 2 paragraphs worth of crying about a stupid idea I got... For the sake of this blog I will now copy and paste every message I sent for the sake of this. 

IM CRASHING OUT IM CRASSHING OUT IMA CRAHSIGN O/ut IM CRAHSING OUT OH MY BGDOD I HATE BEING A WRITER ADN GIVEN THE ABILITY OH FREE EXPRRESSION AND THE INFINATE FO++WONDERS OF IMAGINNATIONA

i hope you know i'm writing this on my chromebook by the way and holding down the shift key with my pinky is currently the most atrocious thing i've ever done because i don't know how to use caps lock on this thing and my fingers are flying across the keyboard like im playing piano dude

i came up with a secret 3rd version and decided that i like it better than the other two i sent you just because its more cuter and seems more accurate compared to the others because of how johnny would react to kenny's comment about how josh and peter would probably need the little retreat more than them, but then i was hit with a writers block because i dont know how else to progress the story until I put my phone away and laid flat on my back in bed as the song Die With Me by Type O Negative played in the background. 

and as I was left with my thoughts and very creative imaginationary world that hhas no limit or filter whats so ever, i came up with a scenario so good i was unconciously and physically reenacting the scene as my mind improved and payed out the "script" so perfectly that as soon as I finished playing it out at best twice (2nd time was to clean up the details) I sat up, grabbed my phone and threw it in front of me because it was such a good idea that not even William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet could compare 

BUT I WAS SO HAPPY WITH THE IDEA I PULLED OUT MY CHROMEBOOK INSTEAD TO WRITE IT

and ykw happened right after I logged in? I forgot every last and small devestatingly good detail

SO I HAD TO STARE AT THE DOCUMENT AND RETHINK MY LIFE DECISIONS AS TO WHY I DIDNT WRITE IT ON MY PHONE

...So yeah thats basically it, thanks for reading my burst of emotions over a fan fic 😭

—Signed, Hansiel

p.s I am experiencing heavy emotional grief over this loss and the most insane writers block