college..

idek why im here at this point my moms the one who forced me to into college after i graduated from highschool. i didn't really get a choice in the matter of what i wanted to do and im really only doing this for my mom and my grandparents but not for myself. they wanted me to major in nursing but my heart just wasn't it i had to do these general classes and i ended up failing most of them because my mental health was so bad. it's like i tried but i didn't want to do anymore of it yk? anyways because i failed pretty much most of my classes i was put on academic probation and i had to retake the classes i failed for the summer which is what im doing now. i didn't realize how fast summer classes go by it's so like crunched you barely even have time and that's stressing me out currently because i only have one week left until my class ends. my family really only care about my grades and success then how im really doing and it really does take a toll on me because i feel behind. so behind from everyone else and i hate the feeling. tbh college really makes me feel dumb and stupid if i thought highschool was bad then this is 10x worse. ive tried making friends at my college but it just never seemed to work out so i spend my time alone at campus and don't bother making friends. it's pretty lonely but fuck we ball it anyways i did have some career ideas that i thought about before and was interested in and the few careers i had in mind was fashion designer, graphic designer, tattoo artists or a photographer. anything art related i would've love to do since i like to draw but lately ive been in artblock and i just don't even think my art is good enough for that. plus my family disapproved of it because they told me that it wouldn't get me anywhere in life and how i need to do something that helps me to be successful and get money like with nursing but i don't even know what i want to do now. im pretty much just lost and don't feel like i even belong in college if i don't even know what im doing for a major. i feel like im just wasting my time honestly and it sucks. can anyone relate to this too?