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I’m really sorry you’re going through this. Reading this honestly broke my heart a little. Nobody deserves to feel like they are constantly walking on eggshells at home or like they have no place where they can just feel safe and loved

I want you to know that the fact you’re still here, writing this, talking about your feelings, and appreciating the people who make you feel understood says a lot about you. Even if things feel unbearable right now, there is still a part of you that is looking for connection and hoping things can get better

I’m really glad you have your Russian friend and that you found people online who treat you with kindness. Having even one person who listens and understands can mean so much when you feel alone. But please don’t carry all of this pain only by yourself. You deserve support from people who can help you through these moments too

Please stay with us. Keep talking, keep writing, keep sharing the things that make you happy, even if they seem small. I hope you get to experience the peaceful life you’re imagining someday. You deserve those moments ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ