dawn (poem)

this is it, this is the end 

memories pass me by yet again 

each one painful, enough to make my eyes water 

each carefully crafted persona of mine slowly begins to break and falter 

i won't bother writing a letter 

i won't bother to reach out 

i won't bother to disturb anyone with stupid, pointless shouts 

i'll let myself go and nobody will know 

why exactly i decided to go 

i feel nothing. emotionless. lifeless already 

that's how i know i am ready 

i want to throw up until i am empty 

i want to scratch my skin open 

i want to bleed and laugh and rot 

i want to be poisoned, i want to be shot 

i want people to forget and move on 

i want to watch the sunrise at dawn