ego and the entries 8: "stuff/Nausea's (late) Night Wish"

6/28 "Does It Hurt? Good. You're Alive - Girls Rituals, Jreg October 9 2025"

you know how boring life would be if everything went the way you wanted it to, no struggle no nothing??? its only fun to achieve your goals because you worked so hard for it. just having it received to you makes that want for it feel dull and worthless. "okay, ive got it. now what?" like that. its nice to struggle. but its also okay to feel envious of those who have never struggled in their entire lives. even if you can guarantee it that their life is probably meaningless and empty as they have nothing to work towards or do to fill that gap between moments where there's nothing to be done.

life is kind of a loop of that kind of thing. people hate jobs and going to school, but without it then what else would we do for the rest of our lives? it's like 17776 where they just played american football for the rest of eternity. but we aren't immortal with infinite time on our hands for something as massive as 17776... people would be bound to get bored of it anyway. "hey guys, I have the rest of my life ahead of me and I dont want to watch or participate in a massive football game to pass the time until I die." thats why jobs and schools exist. it just gives us stuff to do until we keel over and people kind of treat like way more but thats kind of all life is. I dont even mean it in a pessimistic sort of way, I'm not looking at it negatively at all.

we learn and work because there's quite literally nothing else to do. imagine being born and then doing absolutely nothing for the rest of your life. I don't know, I'm kind of happy I get to have the experience of working and education. not many people get that privilege anyway, you know? it's best to appreciate what you have. I probably sound really stupid.

thank you friendrewind, end of ego entry 8