I don't really know

Idk if anyone else relates with me but basically I really hate physical touch from people that I hate and even people that I love or know cuz sometimes I hate when people try to touch me without permission and then whenever I'm having a bad day they decide to touch me and then I get mad and then they wonder why I'm getting mad over the stupidest thing but I really hate physical touch and at the same time I also love it from people that I love but I also can hate it even if it's the person that I like I don't know why I'm like this but that's just me -____- 

And I also hate whenever my dad touches me  and says "I love you" or he  doesn't let go when I ask him. He's very strong also so I can't do nothing about it I tried pushing him off and I always fight with him and sometimes I like giving hugs first and sometimes I like whenever people hug me first but I hate it at the same time idkkk lolllll. But I really hate my dad whenever he touches me without permission T___T