earlier today, i went with my grandmother to visit my old mans grave, and it had me thinking about remains and their handling in general
my father was cremated and generally, i think when i pass, id want the same. do not waste a whole damn plot of land to put a box of my embalmed body in it, id prefer (if if buried at all) to just let my body rot in the soil!
generally speaking, i find it unproductive to treat my (or anyones) remains like they need to be this spectacle of sadness and grief. they simply dont have to be. my grandmother had actually struggled with that for a while, with my fathers remains, as she felt bad "trapping" some of his ashes somewhere (shes somewhat spiritual and superstitious but i cant pinpoint it) but i see the ashes as they are, just my father. a "piece" of him so to speak, one i can visit and hold or see and remember.
ive told most people in my life a sorta-joke that, when i pass, i want my ashes to be put into a firework and lit off in the yard. now granted, im mostly joking, but i usually say that to imply like, hey, take my death as a time to reminisce on the good i did and the person i was. dont make it some sappy shitty ceremony where people weep, id never want my last memory with those i love to be like that. if i can leave the world with a happy memory, if theres some final resting place, id rest there happy!
maybe im the odd one, who knows. miss you, dad
THE BEST OF ME
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KRAMMARKS
I like the idea of being cremated, rather than being in a coffin with a grave mark, but have those remains used in a soil and have a small tree planted there. When my dad passed 13 years ago, he was also cremated and was put in a bag, and my family bought a rotating photo urn to memorialize him. As much as I miss him, considering I didn't have much time with him for my first five years of life, I won't forget the good memories I had with him and I'm content with what I have in my life with my mother and older sister.
ziv
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My favorite time during funerals is after the prayer and lunch(or dinner) where everyone sits around over tea and talk about all the things they love and miss about the person. since every funeral I’ve been to has been an old family member I wasnt familiar with, these talks let me know all about them. celebrating their life with laughter and joy :)