Hoping tomorrow is a better day

I feel shitty, I had made my ex block me because my friend suggested it, I had wrote a blog on spacehey hoping they'd see it then block me. They did then I wrote that I did it on purpose and they said "I had a depressive episode, you could've just told me" and I responded "I wanted you to have a reason to block me so I couldn't unblock you and so you wouldn't have the thought of unblocking me on your mind 😅" and they said "So you just care about yourself?" I didn't mean to make it seem like that, they even suggested I stopped going back to my ex's and I just thought to write, have them block me and delete it. I don't know what I did wrong plus no one saw it so I don't really understand what I did to care about myself, plus I didn't say anything private yk and I mostly had the focus on me, they always tried reminding me of the last I want to forget. I told them I want a innocent image and to be innocent and they were always like "Well you aren't innocent" like? And for the people whom think I could've blocked them, I have an unhealthy relationship with unblocking people, I have had them blocked then unblocked them because I felt bad so my friend suggested having them block me so I wouldn't have a choice unblock them.

What did I do?