gap year

Hello everyone! I'm currently studying for international relationships and polytics in russia (pretty ironic). Recently i've been able to leave my abusive relationship, get past my triggers from a long lasting trauma and I even learned how to live on my own (with the financial support of my parents, of course). I found a wonderful boyfriend which showed me that not all men are bad and violent, and he helps me with my mental state a lot. But it've been hard to get out of bed lately or to spend a day without crying or skipping classes... I knew that my trauma made me severely depressed, but it seems like when I finally make something good out of myself and my life, this depressed and childish part of me still stays. I'm not getting any proper sleep and I don't even know the reason why. I can only have a good nap when my boyfriend comes to visit on the weekends.

I really thought this mental sickness would pass if I make everything right in life, but I suppose I need medical therapy instead.

Today I thought to myself that I probably need a gap year (we have that option in our university). I still don't have a job and I know that my mom will be mad about it. She will come home in like 4 hours and I'm planning to talk to her abt it. I got offered a job in a private school by my close friend, who's also taking a gap year because of her mental state. She doesn't get paid much, but it seems like this money will be enough to feed me :3 The sad part is that I probably won't be having enough money to buy gifts to my wonderful boyfriend and my amazing friends.

I am really thankful to whoever is reading this. Everyone needs a space to vent and share their life expiriences