head-first for halos

Something is deeply wrong with me. I'm writing this with my tears drying up my cheeks. I thought everything was okay. It's not. I'm bawling my eyes out on a random Friday while watching some movie all alone in my bedroom not even with my family. And I'm doing it purely because I can't talk about my feelings with anyone. I'm doing it because everyone should rely on me, not the other way around. I need to be strong, I'm THE good girl. Everyone thinks something of me something what isn't me. For some reason, recently I started to think that tears are the sign of weakness. Or maybe it wasn't recently. I lost the track long time ago, just like I lost my ability to cry normally. I can't muster more than a few tears and then I just stare into the space. That makes me feel like less of a human. But I never was purely human, have I?