I hate having friends with money

This is a long one.

My friends are not filthy rich but they are the kind of people who do more than four vacations a year and don’t really worry about money.

Here’s the thing, it was the second time in the whole summer break that most of the group could hang out and also the first time in a long period that I could afford to go with them, we were going to the beach and my mom offered to pay for my train ticket after seeing me not hanging out with anyone so I just had to buy some fruit to bring something at least. The thing it’s that the only topic of conversation for the first like 2 hours was what they had been doing for the last month, bruh their last month was more than what I did in my entire life and I just felt so bad, I didn’t say anything tho because it’s not their fault but I feel like I’m not experiencing anything and I know if I continue like this I will just grow resentment towards them and I don’t want to. Also one of my friends when to my dream destination, I’ve been wanting to go there with my mom for years and she was talking about it like any other trip.  

Do you remember when I said it was the first time I could hang out with them in a long time? Well, my friends love to go to concerts, theaters and parties. The concerts they go to are super expensive, for example, Olivia Rodrigo, I was checking up prices and there wasn’t anything lower than 200 € so I didn’t end up going with them. Theaters, on the other hand, are more affordable depending on the location but it’s still not something that I can do regularly. There’s also parties, the one that makes me feel the worse, for reference in my area there’s a lot of night clubs for minors which are about 30 minutes by car and are around 15-20€ for ticket per person, plus around seven euros each drink. I BEGGED my parents to bring me there at least once but they don’t have enough gas money to be waisting it on me, so I never went to a night club, not even for my birthday, the closest thing I’ve done is doing a “street party”, I don’t know how to call it in English, it’s a bunch of people drinking in the middle of an abandoned field with music, not legal ik, but I can’t even afford that sometimes because the bottles are expensive too. 

I hate being poor sm.