I hateeeeeeeeeee someone so bad

I have this girl I like and she says she loves me and I'm really special to her and I am obsessed obsessed over her. She gets jealous when I talk to others,,,, but she doesn't want me really lolol

I know I'm not deserving of love but it still hurts. I have given her everything and gotten very little in return. I so badly want to her her back in some way but if I do I will have broken my promise to her and she will leave me :( 

So I will suffer but I still need to complain </3