I think it's back :( TW: Talk of eating disorders.

I don't really know how to say this without just saying it, to be honest.

So... I think my ED is back.

I tried eating but I just couldn't manage to put any food in my mouth.

I have really really bad stomach cramps and I had to take ibuprofen for them.

The meds helped a little bit, but it still hurts a little.

I'm really fucking scared.

When I first got an ED I was at the absolute worst part of my life.

The lowest I possibly could've been.

At least I have my partners and my mom and my sister who can be there for me.

But I still feel really alone.

I guess it's just the mental shit telling me no one really cares.

Whatever, I guess.

But I'm still really scared.

My stomach hurts.

I've completely lost my appetite.

I hate that this is happening to me.

I was doing really good.

I was happy.

I don't know what happened.

I'm confused.

I'm scared.

I'm extremely worried.

At least I get to go back to my mom's early.

I'm going home on Saturday.

I told her everything that happened and she said I can take the bus home and she'd pay for it.

So at least there's that.

It'll be good for me to be alone with my mom for a while.

And I'll be home for her birthday this way.

Anyway, that's it, I guess.

Just wanted to share, in case I randomly stop posting a lot and get really lazy.

I'll update you guys about it, though. It could just be a false alarm.

Anyway, bye.

Ivy out. ✌