I was too lazy to get my journal so ur getting a blog

I think my problem is that I kinda want to do everything and that's stopping me from doing anything. I've seen a thousand videos about it and gotten more advice than I needed and nothing really sticks but I'm scared to fail and I'm scared to be nothing. but idk I tend to be really optimistic which contradicts an entire slice of my personality. some part of me wants to give up art, and film, and creation and just wants to ball up and die and the other parts are screaming that I CAN do it all I just have to get out of my head even this blog I mean are you kidding? i didn't want to walk to room but I can adjust my position to one more comfortable to type in, and type a blog that strangers I don't know are going to see? I feel like I blinked and everyone expects an adult now but no ones taught me anything I don't know anything, I still can't drive and I have to beg multiple days in a row for them to take me to drive. I mean whatever I'll figure everything out eventually.

I'm also kinda upset because I've been writing this story but then I lost motivation and now it's just sitting there.

#ThisisnottheteenageexperienceIwaspromised #longahhhashtag #hi