massive vent so its a #holyyap

i dont like my parents srry to say this but they make me feel bad about cutting which makes me want to cut more my step dad thinks im prob selfish for doing that everyone does i dont blame them i compare myself to a bug because of how much shame, i dehumanize myself due to my shame everytime i relapse i think the deites i worship hate me which makes me relapse more i say ill get better but im slowly getting bad again, god i wish i was pure again i wish i didnt have this a coping mechanism  im sorry to ANYONE that has to put up with me!!