not what you expect from me

Here's the scene in the movie where I blog about a gig I just played. Predictable, right? Well I am going to talk about something that happened BEFORE the show. Wish I could post pictures on here but you can see them on my Facebook and Instagram pages.

The sunset was gorgeous.

Yep, you read that right. Supernova were setting up for soundcheck and when I looked out the window, the sky was a fantastic shade of red with the sky looking fierce yet gorgeous at the same time. I stopped what I was doing to race outside and snap photos. Even saw two ducks (or were they geese?) floating by, and it seemed like the perfect metaphor for my life right now.

In the past, I had to be busy and look important. That's what people are impressed with, right? Be a part of the machine, shut your mouth, and you will be rewarded. I used to be chained to a desk for years and when I was fired from that job in 2015, it was the best day of my life. I could finally breathe and be what I wanted to be. Not be what some curmudgeon boss wanted so he could feel less insecure about himself. Most authority figures are flawed.

The life I have right now is where I need to be. It's almost perfect. Nothing will ever be 100%, and you won't catch me acting like that on my socials. But can safely say that where I'm at right now it where I belong. Most people are afraid of pure freedom as they are used to being sheltered by control, under the false pretense of "love". When I learned that I couldn't be loved in the way I wanted, I had to reflect inward and start loving myself first. It can be done, and it's not to appear selfish. It's a sense of inner pride, when others forced me to feel small.

So this sunset was special to me because where I live, I hardly see the sky so vibrant. Playing at Jefferson House and other neighboring taverns/bars gives me the opportunity to view these sunsets because of the wide-open spaces. True, I have seen many sunsets in my life but this one...can't quite put my finger on it. It just resonated with me. And after a few minutes, I stepped back inside to finish setting my gear up. In the past I would have said "Next time..." but after losing three classmates (two in the same week), I learned that the cliche is so true...

LIFE'S TOO DAMN SHORT!

Oh and the show was fantastic, BTW.