Rant/Vent

TW : This rant is petty asf, also english is not my first language sooo...

14 november 2026

You ever wanted to go to a place, a place where you can finally be free and not be subjected to shackles and truly, gleefully enjoy your own presence? Longed for it for a long time, hoping you could go there at least... once? And then had the only opportunity to do so cruelly, inhumanely, stripped away from you? Has it ever happened to thee, your brethren, your sestern, your maiden or your eldren? If not, I envy you, immensely so, because that did happen, to me.

I had a place where I wanted to go, the downtown library, a rather big one, much better than the one we have at our district, in fact, it would be akin to blasphemy to even utter their names in the same sentence. It's one of the only places where I am allowed to go alone that is far from home, and  therefore, where I could read, and do everything I truly wanted to.

Yesterday, I accompanied my younger sister to the hospital, nothing alarming, it was simply supposed to be a vision check/eye exam, after that, I would go to the library and she would go home, that was my plan. However we were not admitted because my sister is still underage and it was mandatory for a legal guardian to be present with her, which I unfortunately am not. Despite our explanation being that my mother could not, in any way come with us, the staff denied our entry claiming that there's nothing they could do about it. Disappointed, we made a new appointment, and left the hospital, not without telling our mother about the whole ordeal, which very obviously pissed her off. Not only that, she also recieved a big check from our internet and cell phone provider which angered her even more. She told us to go buy groceries and head straight to home immediately, since she needed help with my 4 months old baby brother. Obviously, she did not give me permission to go to the library, and said I could go tomorrow. I accepted my fate, just like days before. Afterall, I was used to it, I've been hearing the same sentence for more than a month now.

So the day passed, after eating delicious shawarwas for dinner, I, ffilled with hope, went to sleep. I was geeked, as the youngsters would say, thinking that the day after, nothing would stop me from going.

Surely, you would think that God, if he does exist would notice his creation's great suffering and would not take away their only hope, or Nature (if God doesn't exist) would not dare to disappoint it's good natured child, as I believe myself to be decent enough to deserve a single library trip, right ...right?

......

NNNNAAAAAAHHHHHHHH, apparently the fabric of REALITY ITSELF would LITERALLY COMBUST if I didn't get sick SPECIFICALLY THE DAY WHERE I COULD FINALLY COULD GO TO THIS GOD FORSAKEN LIBRARY.

Anyway, here I am, laying in my bed, with a nose more clogged than an Taco Bell toilet

WHILE my egg donor and my siblings, are outside, having a great time together, NAAAAAH

You know... I think I might be this Universe's opp, cause AIN'T NO WAY I keep taking L's on a daily basis just because. This shit is NOT "accidental"  

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk, here's a picture of my cat, his name is Boba ฅ⁠^⁠•⁠ﻌ⁠•⁠^⁠ฅ