So Much for Being "Accepted"

Ugh. Where do I even start? So, I came out to my mom back in June/July and she's been totally awesome. Like, actually supportive. It was such a relief. But my dad? He didn't find out until September, and it's been a complete nightmare ever since. His reaction when he finally heard? "I may not like it but you're still my son." Looking back, that should've been my first clue. He doesn't accept me. He just tolerates me while making sure I know he disapproves. Thanks, I guess? Anyway, the other day he showed me some trailer for a TV show with a lady on a stripper pole. I told him, "Hey, that's making me uncomfortable, maybe don't show me sexualized stuff like that." Dude absolutely lost it. He got super defensive and started this whole passive-aggressive guilt trip: "Sorry for showing you that since you're a child, I'll treat you like a child from now on." Like... WHAT?! That's not what I said at all. I just said the trailer was inappropriate. I set a boundary. I didn't ask to be babied. But because I "called him out" (his words, not mine), now he's on this massive power trip. He suddenly wants to police my Instagram posts (apparently I post "crude jokes"), my music (can't listen to anything about sex), and my YouTube (no 90s rap videos with women dancing). ALL. BECAUSE. I. SAID. ONE. THING. HE. DID. WAS. WEIRD. He keeps saying I'm trying to "win an argument" and "outsmart him." He mocks me for researching stuff ("don't believe everything on the internet") like... bro, if you tell me strip clubs are normal family outings, yeah I'm gonna Google that. He claims I go to ChatGPT to "talk about things I don't know about" as if that's... bad? As if being informed is a crime? And he says I "can't even talk calmly" about this. YEAH, NO SHIT I got frustrated! You violated a boundary, mocked me for having it, and then started taking away my autonomy to prove you still have power over me. Oh, and the best part? He thinks my bisexuality is a joke because I posted "I'm a Bisexual sponge" on my Instagram notes. I was joking around, being comfortable with who I am, and he took that as "proof" I'm not serious. It's been seven months and he's still looking for loopholes to avoid accepting it. It's classic Gen X "I turned out fine" narcissism. He wants to be the "cool dad" who shows edgy stuff until you actually have opinions or standards, then you get punished for acting like an adult while he throws tantrums. He literally cannot separate "you did something I didn't like" from "you are bad," so any criticism becomes a personal attack he has to defend against. He also thinks spanking isn't abuse and would probably lose it if I said otherwise, which tells you everything about his parenting philosophy. I hate this. I have one parent who actually supports me and one who treats my identity like a phase and my boundaries like disrespect. And somehow I'm the one who "thinks they're smarter than everyone else" because I don't just nod along to his bullshit. I haven't even came out to my entire family yet. He even forced me to call my grandma to say I'm Bisexual, and I said that "I'm not attracted to all men & women" because he might have a reaction of me looking at a girl or boy, which is so fucking stupid. And a grown ass man is telling me how to be a Bisexual. LIKE BITCH, YOU ARE IN YOUR GODDAMN MID 50'S, UR NOT GONNA TELL ME HOW TO BE BI!! AS IF YOU HAVE EVEN BEEN BI!!! And he's doing all of this because I said "I'm a Bisexual sponge" on my Instagram notes. Parents should not fucking worry about what I post. It's my fucking account, I post whatever the fuck I want!!! Thanks for listening to my rant. I just needed to get this out.