Now, this is going to be a long story... it was freshman year of high school, and I had spent all year trying to get a boyfriend while failing miserably. Since all my friends were getting one, I felt like I needed to have my One True Love. So I would sorta force myself to have feelings. I had become good friends with this guy; he seemed so cool and funny and awesome, and we had 2 classes together, so we talked A LOT. He had a gf for a while, but then they suddenly broke up. And then I realized I had feelings for him, so I decided that he was the one I was gonna score!
I try flirting with him (I'm terrible at flirting...) and I begin to notice that he's acting strange around me. He always wants to be around me all of a sudden, he always picks me first for our games in theatre class, and there was this ONE thing that made me realize "Dude there's no way I'm actually gonna have a chance with him."ย
It was the day of the pope election in biology class, we had a sub and they didn't really GAF about us that day, so the guy and his friends were all huddled up together at their desks watching it on the guy's phone because they thought it was so cool. Then, this dude INVITES ME TO SIT RIIIIGHT NEXT TO HIM because "I'm catholic too." Ok????
I confess my feelings to him at our annual theatre party (and no I'm not in theatre anymore) and he says yes! Everything seems perfect!ย
When we're together, we're so awkward. Something feels off... I always compliment him and give him gifts, and he just kinda awkwardly stares at me half the time. I just thought he was really really flustered...
Then around 5 months in he breaks up and I go PSYCHO trying to get him back because I really thought this was true love and we were supposed to be together right.
When I finally get over him, he says he's gay now and I decide to go back to my lesbian ways once more because that's what I truly am.
Having your first love be a lavender relationship in disguise is... an interesting experience...