"If rock hit rock, then rock no more" - someone in my history class
"If rock hit rock, then rock no more" - someone in my history class
"How do you look so much like her???"
-random girl in my class after seeing my MOM
“I’m not transphobic I’m js a man” AFTER SAYING EW TO THE FACT THAT MY BROTHERS TRANS? ND THEN HE THOUHT I WAS GONNA KEEP TALKING TO HIM???
My friend told me she was gay and I said "I thought you were American"😭
"UR BRAIN LEAKS OF PRECUM NO TF U ARE NOT"
"you were a late bloomer at being cognant and aware" - me to my friend Dylan


had a teacher in 2nd grade tell me that 1 ÷ 2 was actually not 0.5 and it was one half
she promptly put me in the corner the rest of the school year cause apparently knowing things is misbehaving or something
"Drinking plain water is bad for you" — my father
One time my mom was telling my sister she did something wrong with the dishes or something. My sister, like the very special person she is, responded to this criticism by telling my mom that she was being racist because "I am Irish and therefore a minority." My mom is half Mexican. She also started calling herself a Chinese monk recently.
you dont bust on the first stroke but the first stroke helps you bust 🗣🗣🗣
i once asked, ''i wonder if cinemas in the u.s. have subtitles.''
my friend replied, ''probably for blind people.''
🩷💜🖤 My mom saying "I know and I still use it" after I told her how much Fresh Water A.I uses & what it does to neighborhoods & people that don't have access to clean water...
"yeah they have orange hair"
- mrsurrealist, in response to someone with bright green hair
"how did hellen keller fly a plane you can't fly a plane in brail" "maybe she was the co-pilot" -me and my friend 4am sober
I was talking to a much younger coworker about travelling abroad. She got this confused look on her face and said "So like, do they use American money or fake money?" I had to explain to her that different countries have their own currency. That it's real, just different. She couldnt understand. I felt like gen z was doomed in that moment 😂 She also thought China, Japan, and Korea were just one big country that all spoke Chinese. So. Idk man.
My friends and I where talking and one of them said "I had a dream" I proceeded to shout 'Micheal Jackson' I meant Martin Luther King.
"bulgaria is basically russia anyway" -twat in my grade
“It’s good that there’s less snow here in the winter cuz there’s more for the polar bears :D” ig they thought snow comes from the arctic??
“Why do ice cream shops burn down” - me
“…like in the African country of Cambodia” - kid in my poli sci class trying to defend themselves in a debate.

"The sea is made of rocks" -a classmate
me: "So you're saying a little boy should be beaten because he's a male?"
my shitass brother: "Yes, that's how it is for males"
the most toxic masculine bs comes out of his mouth and I cant help but roll my eyes
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