logged out of my major messaging apps to stop myself from obsessively looking back at past conversations. and to stop myself from waiting for a conversation thatll never come, because i know nobody actually wants my company. they could like it but not. want it. they feel me like a breeze. a fleeting moment,an afterthought. the other way around works, pity just makes me feel worse and i know its a pity thing these days. or a busy thing, which that i dont have a problem with but its... whatever bruh ill save all the small talk. dont want to bother at all.
this blog is all ive got and i wont stop blogging 'til im like, fucking dead. and when im out of words to say, but thats probably when im fucking dead LOL. i need to have something for myself. i have this.
Comments
Displaying 4 of 4 comments ( View all | Add Comment )
dartts
im sorry axel
discmaan_
I’m really glad you have this place where you can express yourself. Sometimes stepping away from apps that make you constantly check, wait, or reread old conversations can actually be a good way to give your mind some peace. I understand that feeling of looking back at messages and wondering if someone cares as much as you do, it can hurt a lot.
But I don’t think you’re just a “fleeting moment” or an afterthought. Sometimes people get caught up in their own lives and they don’t always show appreciation in the way we need, but that doesn’t mean your presence doesn’t matter. The fact that you care so deeply about connections says a lot about you.
Also, please keep writing. Having something that feels like it’s yours, where you can put your thoughts and feelings into words, is really valuable. I hope this blog continues to be a place where you can be yourself, but I also hope you remember that you deserve connections outside of here too, people who genuinely want to hear from you, not just people who reply out of obligation.
And hey, don’t stop creating or sharing your thoughts. The world is better with people who have things to say ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ
Ina
You did good. Especially good for your own sanity. =￣ω￣=
I know how that feels. People, even people you know or knew, kind of... drift away.
Maybe they were never meant to stay. ~
But don't push yourself down like that. You're not an afterthought... You just need strong winds that push you forward, not faint breezes that pass by.
Keep on blogging! ✨
thank you, i really needed to hear that
by axelraklei777; ; Report